Are you gullible, cynical, or skeptical in your relationships?

Posted on December 15, 2014 by Rusty Stewart PhD

Are you gullible, cynical, or skeptical in your relationships?

Over the years I have witnessed many gullible, cynical, and skeptical people. And I have certainly fallen in every one of those categories before.

In fact, in my gullibility, I have been part of a formal investigation for a past roommate forging $6,700 of my checks, had to kick out 2 other roommates who were sociopaths, and been part of an FBI fraud investigation around a sociopath who hired me and others to form a new company only to find out he was lying about everything. Earlier in my life I always looked for the best in people even though my intuition was screaming “get away from this person now and run fast.” You know the story, “if it’s too good to be true it probably is.”

Then there is the cynical part of me that thinks I am different and what works for others will not work for me. That was equally just as damaging as I closed myself down to other possibilities and opportunities in my past! The cynic is closed-minded.

The healthy part of us is the skeptical part. This is where we investigate, listen to our intuition, and ask for feedback from other open-minded skeptical people. In other words we are critical thinkers, questioning everything, and listening to our intuition and hearts at the same time.

Being skeptical is so important when looking to attract new dream relationship(s).

Whereas cynicism will keep us shut down and untrusting.

And, gullibility will have us being in denial about what’s real and not real in a potential relationship and ultimately getting involved with someone in a BIG LIE!

Which way of being do you choose?

Now it’s time for YOU to decide!

Light & Love,

Dr. Rusty

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Who wants to speed up attracting the relationship(s) of your dreams?

Posted on December 8, 2014 by Rusty Stewart PhD

Who wants to speed up attracting the relationship(s) of your dreams?

My experience over the years with both myself and my clients has been that when we are really focusing our energies on taking care of and nurturing ourselves, living our purpose, and spending blissful quality time with self, we become IRRESISTIBLE!

So why is that Dr. Rusty? Well it’s quite simple but not necessarily easy!

Many times my clients, friends, and yes even me say “I’m tired of being alone and doing things all by myself.” Now, follow up with this question, “if you met yourself somewhere would you be attracted to yourself?”

If you answered yes then you would not have said the first statement, and, you wouldn’t be “NEEDING” somebody! It’s NOT attractive to be needy unless you want a caretaker or a fixer who are needy for people to care for. ICKY! That’s just as unhealthy and dysfunctional.

Like attracts like. We are all magnets. The question is, what type of magnet do you want to be?

OK great Dr. Rusty I get it. I have to have a Love Affair with myself. But it seems so hard and so foreign.

Remember, simple but not easy. Many of us have deep seated patterns of not liking and loving ourselves, and even engaging in self defeating/damaging and sabotaging behaviors.

So what is the answer, simple, PRACTICE!

Work with a coach, therapist, mentor, groups, or human potential organizations to help uncover your blind spots about how you think and feel about yourself. Stay immersed in this conversation until your experience of yourself shifts.

While you’re doing that get and stay involved with your passion and/or purpose in life. Get clear about the gifts you have been given by the universe and share them with others.

And, nuture yourself, create rituals around self-love. Pleasure yourself for YOU not someone else!

Bottom line is this……the more you are being the characteristics and requirements of your “perfect” partner(s), the more likely they will show up because you are not searching for somebody to SAVE you!

What do you mean SAVE me? I mean SAVE you from YOURSELF!

That IS Certainly NOT attractive to anybody who is healthy, loves themselves, and is up to big things with their purpose and passion in life!

Be the change you want to see in your potential significant others and lovers!

That’s how do you become a Love and Sex Magnet Folks!

Simple, but not easy!

Light & Love,

Dr. Rusty

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How long does it take to attract that special someone?

Posted on December 1, 2014 by Rusty Stewart PhD

Hey Everyone!

How long does it take to attract that special someone?

Over the years I have worked with thousands of people and hundreds of couples. One common thread that I have learned is that it is EASY to attract that special someone into your life. And, the same people have commented that it is HARD to attract that special someone who is compatible sexually, spiritually, emotionally, physically, etc. who is doing their own personal work. Most people were not happy with the results of who they attracted once they woke up from the chemically induced coma of infatuation, idealism, and their own denial!

Let me explain. We all want to be in that extraordinary relationship that dreams are made of. The real question is…..are you willing to be patient, become aware of and release negative patterns from your past, create your own vision statement, have a torrid love affair with yourself, and get crystal clear about your requirements and absolute non-negotiables in relationship?

If not you will be attracted to what many other programs promise out there as a quick and easy way to find your love. There are no shortcuts or quick fixes! This is about you not the other person if you want to attract that healthy partner you’ve always wanted. Your partner or potential partner will mirror exactly energetically where you are at. And, you may not like that! Believe me when I say in both my own life and the lives of my clients, humility will smack you on the side of your head and wake you up to who you are and who you have been being in your life! The way you do anything is the way you do everything!

Everybody can have it all if they are willing to do their work. And it WILL be HARD at times! A step by step plan breaks it down into simple to follow steps, but, anybody that tells you it is going to be easy is full of shit! I believe in setting people up to win and not sugarcoating anything! Anything worthwhile takes time and commitment. And, it doesn’t have to take forever. But it will require action, follow through, and doing things you don’t want to do to have what and who you say you want!

Are you looking for shortcuts? Are you lonely? Are you frustrated because much of the information out there about love, sex, and relationships does not work like they say?

YOU CAN have it all!

But you must be willing to be patient, become aware of and release negative patterns from your past, create your own vision statement, have a torrid love affair with yourself, and get crystal clear about your requirements and absolute non-negotiables in relationship?

Then you must be able to say NO (especially to sex) if your requirements are not met!!!
Your chemicals will say YES, your intuition will say NO.

This is one of the hardest things to do! And it’s very simple.

Follow the program or plan all the way through and that “perfect” or “special” person(s) will show up in your life when you least expect it! You will become a magnet for people to love you the way you love yourself!

It’s that simple!

Light & Love,

Dr. Rusty

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Did you know that success in every area of your life is about relationships?

Posted on November 24, 2014 by Rusty Stewart PhD

Did you know that success in every area of your life is about relationships?

I certainly didn’t until 2010. I was struggling with my business, money and debt (bankruptcy), and relationships in general even though I was a psychotherapist and couples counselor. In fact I was so frustrated I moved to Portland, OR thinking my life would change there. Boy was I fucking wrong!!!

Wherever you go there you are!

I came back 2 ½ months later with my tail between my legs having to start all over from scratch.

I had failed miserably at establishing relationships to establish a new business, make money, asking for support, and hiring a business coach. In short, I was severely depressed and humbled! I knew I could not do it on my own and had to something completely different.

This led me to immerse myself with course after course in relationships and communication and hiring a coach even though I didn’t have the money to do so. I found a way and became unstoppable!

I learned to take 100 % responsibility in all my relationships and business outcomes. My life was transforming before my very eyes!

So if I want wealth, health, an inspirational business, the relationship(s) of my dreams, an RV, time freedom, traveling etc., I MUST be constantly developing stellar relationships with supportive people that are aligned with my growing edge.

So what does that mean? Suffice it to say that I have to be fully self expressed and communicate authentically, truly listen to others and get into their world, take risk and trust myself and others, and be willing to do whatever it takes even if I don’t want to!

In essence, walking my talk in everything I know works with relationships, romantic, friendships, colleagues, and everybody I meet and come in contact with. When I am Being this way and doing these things with an open heart my life SIZZLES in every area with abundance!

This requires me to let go of being single minded and be open to multiple outcomes in all my conversations. If I think I have to have this before I can do that I am in scarcity and limited thinking which results in limited outcomes and zero REAL change!

Are you being single minded? Are you thinking that once something (job, health, divorce, money issues, body issues, etc.) is handled THEN I will attract the relationship of my heart’s desire?

Everything comes down to relationships, EVERYTHING!

You can’t transform your life by using the same limiting belief systems or personal paradigm to attract something DIFFERENT!

It Will NEVER work! It’s inconsistent with the laws of the universe!

You know exactly why you have received this message today!

Light & Love,

Dr. Rusty

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Who’s ready to attract and keep deep lasting love?

Posted on November 9, 2014 by Rusty Stewart PhD

Who’s ready to attract and keep deep lasting love?

I feel so terrific today after teaching a 3 day Reiki I class! I so enjoy tapping in to the energy and spiritual realm while teaching how to stay grounded at the same time!

I am even more excited to coach a group of people committed to attracting true love and smoldering sex!!!

Why? I have listened to you and assembled an extraordinarily powerful group program that is unsurpassed by any other class I have ever created before!

So, if you want to attract the relationship(s) of your dreams with deep lasting love and sizzling spiritual sex, you better act quickly as space is LIMITED!

This proven one of a kind group coaching online/teleclass and private Facebook group will be launching after the 1st of the year. Here are the RESULTS you can expect when you follow and apply the program:

  1. A step by step plan
  2. Healing and releasing past hurts and negative relationship patterns
  3. Yummy self love
  4. Unwavering trust in yourself and others
  5. Incredible self confidence
  6. Powerful and effective communication skills
  7. Full self expression
  8. Exhilarating compatibility
  9. Positioning yourself in the most successful venues to find a match for you
  10. Opening up to unlimited possibilities in your love life
  11. Sizzling spiritual sex
  12. Deep lasting love

Is that pulse pounding or what?

I am interviewing potential candidates right now! Once again, I am only taking a select group of committed people that are coachable! You must be coachable to achieve these remarkable results!

Click HERE NOW to act quickly, interview, and reserve your spot! This electrifying program will sell out quickly!

If you have any questions hit reply to this email!

Ready, set, go!

Light and Love,

Dr. Rusty

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Are you connecting with your tribe?

Posted on November 2, 2014 by Rusty Stewart PhD

Are you connecting with your tribe? It is essential if you want to attract the relationship(s) of your dreams that you put yourself out there and connect with your tribe!

Last night I went to PEX’s Halloween Ball. PEX is The Philadelphia Experiment, in essence, an east coast Burning Man. Even though I did not feel well I forced myself to go. And boy, am I glad I did! I put myself out there with my tribe!

What a spectacular night and morning till 5am!!! The music, costumes, and people were over the top! I felt so at home and so loved…..and…..some women wanted to play……HELLO!

Being immersed in like minded groups is telling the universe you are ready to attract compatible partner(s). Sitting on the sidelines, or, in the bleachers, does not work.

This is an important component of following a step by step plan to attract beautiful souls into your life! We function best as human beings when we interact in groups with similar mindsets, requirements, wants, and needs.

Are you putting yourself out there no matter what???

Are you unattached to the outcome?

Are you willing to take risks?

Are you willing to do things you do not want to do in order to get what you say you want?

If you seriously ask yourself these questions you will be able to ascertain your level of commitment in creating the sultry deep lasting love relationship(s) of your wildest dreams!

Get yourself in groups NOW!!! Do not wait!!! Planting seeds is what attraction is all about!!!

Now get out there and till the soil!!!

Light and Love,

Dr. Rusty

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Do you know what relationship transformation is?

Posted on October 26, 2014 by Rusty Stewart PhD

Do you know what relationship transformation is?

I didn’t really know what relationship transformation was until I turned 50 years old! At that time I came out about being pansexual, polyamorous, and into BDSM. I just could not be inauthentic about my sexuality anymore. And I wasn’t attracting the relationships of my dreams because I did not own my wants and desires openly.

This led me to dig deeper inside myself with the help of intensive coaching to reveal my blind spots or blockages that were getting in the way of me having it ALL! As a result of this deeper work I have become fully self-expressed and communicate my truth wherever I go and whomever I meet. I realized that I must do something new and different, be uncomfortable, be courageous, and put it out there if I was to attract like minded people and lovers.

That is relationship transformation! Now you may or may not have the same experiences as above with your transformation. However, to be clear, change is not transformation. Transformation occurs when we become aware of blockages that are stopping us that we have no awareness of.

What are you unaware of? Some of you may have just answered that question in your heads. And, we cannot be aware of what we are not aware of at the same time! Gotcha! That was a trick question, LOL!

This is the missing link, so to speak, that has us not being in the relationship(s) of our dreams. Blind spots MUST BE UNCOVERED for true transformation to occur! Otherwise we will continue to do the same things over and over again expecting a different result. Or we will continue to collect new information and knowledge while continuing to sabotage ourselves because the blockages are still there! INSANITY! This is why many programs do not work.

By the way, uncovering the unknown that is unknown to us cannot be done by ourselves. Otherwise we would have already done it!

“The course does not aim at teaching the meaning of love, for that is beyond what can be taught. It does aim, however, at removing the blocks to the awareness of loves presence, which is your natural inheritance” (A Course in Miracles, 1975).

Aren’t you ready for a miracle?

Light & Love

Dr. Rusty

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Have you fully accepted yourself and your sexuality?

Posted on October 19, 2014 by Rusty Stewart PhD

Have you fully accepted yourself and your sexuality?

I was thinking about speaking to this today as I put on my leather wrist bands. There was a time when I would have felt shame and been concerned with what other people thought when I dressed up in my leather bondage garb.

Not anymore! (It took me until I was 50 years old folks, LOL!) I’m proud of being self expressed and fully accepting of my alternative and kinky lifestyle.

Many of us are curious about other lifestyles and don’t express ourselves because we are not fully accepting of ourselves. In essence we do not trust ourselves. And if we are holding back our true desires around our sexuality, then we are being inauthentic with ourselves and with our current lover if we are in relationship. This is NOT Self Love or Self Acceptance!

QUESTION EVERYTHING! Most of the time, our beliefs come from childhood and societal programming. Those beliefs are not necessarily ours. Question them. Try them on. If they do not fit, throw them out!

Beliefs have to be defended because we do not directly experience them as true. When we have an experience of our own truth, what works for us, then it does not need to be defended. In order to do this we must be willing to get out of our comfort zone and explore.

Don’t get trapped in a lifestyle or with a partner that does not allow YOUR TRUE sexual expression! Believe me, you will regret it someday.

Instead, be authentic. Be in discovery. Explore your sexual self. And radiate that beautiful energy wherever you go! And by all means, communicate your true sexuality with your partner or partners.

Coming out is glorious thing! It speeds up the process to full self acceptance. And ultimately, FREEDOM!

Have fun!

Light & Love,

Dr. Rusty

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Do you put yourself first?

Posted on October 12, 2014 by Rusty Stewart PhD

Do you put yourself first? Now that may come across to some of you as selfish. So let me distinguish between self-full, selfish, and caretaking/co-dependent.

But first let’s rewind my life back 25 years. In 1989 I started to do my personal growth work with a human potential training company called Lifespring. Prior to that, I played the role of mediator and caretaker with my family of origin. And as a result, I carried that into all of my relationships. When I broke that habit in 1989 my family and friends did not like it.

Fast forward to the late 90’s here’s a personal example of the healthier me. My sister knocked on the door of my bedroom while I was meditating and said “I need you to take me up to the car place right now!” I could have responded 3 different ways:

  1. Sure, I’ll be right out to take you (caretaking/co-dependent, unhealthy)
  2. No, I’m in the middle of meditating (selfish, unhealthy)
  3. I’d be happy to take you after I finish my meditation in 10-15 minutes (self-full, healthy)

And, even today I am challenged at times to revert back to old ways of being.

Does this sound familiar? In what ways are you not putting yourself first? And, if you’re not, is there resentment with others and anger at yourself for not doing so? The first 2 options above do not work if you want to be in a healthy Loving relationship with yourself and others, especially a significant other/partner.

You see, when we’re focused on caretaking for others it’s like writing a check from your bank account with no money in it. Thus the check will bounce. Who do you need to be and what do you need to do to replenish your bank account of self? The other side of the coin is selfishness which is like hording money in our bank account and writing very few checks. Who do you need to be and what do you need to do to open your heart to yourself and others? Wow, a balancing act, right? It gets back to self-love, self-confidence, and taking a stand for yourself by being fully self-expressed.

If you need clarity around this please feel free to contact me!

Light and Love,

Dr. Rusty

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What is stopping you?

Posted on October 5, 2014 by Rusty Stewart PhD

What's Stopping YouWhat is stopping you? What is in the way?

As I’m writing this blog, I was thinking about what has me stopped in certain areas of my life? Now I got to get this written before the Eagles game comes on. There it is………priorities……….maybe. What do you think? The truth is I am stopping myself, always have, and always will if I CHOOSE to? Right now I am stopped getting myself to the gym and eating healthier. Now I could tell you all sorts of stories, excuses, or circumstances in my life, but none of those matters. There is no truth there. I will create the time, space, motivation, or money if I really want to do something. So what has me stopped from getting my ass to the gym? It’s very simple, my mindset. When I truly want to take care of myself and feel better, I will drag my butt in there. It’s the same with relationships.

Our beliefs affect our mindset, and, our mindset affects our beliefs. Hmmmm, sounds like a vicious circle huh? It’s like that inner critic or little voice in our head vs. our higher self or intuition that ALWAYS knows best. It’s a matter of choice again. And, if our mindset does not believe we have choice we become victims of stories and circumstances. So if our belief system is one of openness, possibility, discovery, and taking risk we are in an expansive mindset where miracles can happen. However, if our beliefs are closed down, status quo, righteous, or no possibility, we are in a contracted mindset where victimhood, cynicism, and resignation reside. Two voices, two choices. Which one do you choose?

Our mindset and beliefs are the most important piece of attracting or enhancing the relationship(s) of our dreams. If we do not believe we can have that, then there is no possibility to work with. Expansive mindsets attract expansive mindsets. Contracted mindsets attract contracted mindsets. Like attracts like. Expansion comes from a mindset and way of being of Love. Contraction comes from a mindset and way of being of fear. Are you getting this!

Now you can argue all you want about this or that relationship is not working because of them. I don’t buy it and NEVER will! It ALWAYS comes down to us, always. With a different mindset and transformed beliefs we can have the relationship of our dreams, heal and transform a current relationship, or choose to leave one regardless of the circumstances. We have so much power and energy in our bodies that we could light up a city! Channeled properly, we can manifest any relationship we want, as long as we’re not attached to the outcome. And as long as we take 100% responsibility for what we have and are creating around us. Curious? Skeptical?

Now action is where the pedal meets the metal! Who is willing to transform their beliefs and mindset? Who is sick and tired of being sick and tired? I can’t wait to hear from you!

Light and Love,

Dr. Rusty

 

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